Review of IRON SKY

IRON SKY

Science fiction, Nazis, politics, Sarah Palin, parody, comedy 2012.

In 2018, the American president (never named but an obvious parody of Sara Palin), hoping to boost her ratings before the next election, sends two astronauts to the moon.  One, JAMES WASHINGTON, is black and quite photogenic, which is no surprise because he's a male model. They land near the border of the far-side of the moon, and--wow--WASHINGTON finds an industrial city, a Fourth Reich built by Nazis when the Third Reich fell. The Nazis plan to conquer the Earth, but their computers, 1940's relics, don't help. When Washington shows them a smart phone and says he knows the president, KLAUS ADLER's eyes light up. Klaus, who wants to be the next Furhrer, 'Aryanizes' Washington (makes his skin color Caucasian) and takes him on a flying saucer to Earth to get more smart phones and also to enlist the aid of the president. Klaus' genetically compatible girlfriend, RENATE RICHTER, who had stowed away on the saucer, explains how the Nazis want nothing but love and peace and happiness for all. The president buys it, and the campaign proceeds. However, Washington is really pissed that he now looks white. Renate tells him he should be grateful, but she ends up learning a bit more about the Third Reich than expected. And this blonde Frauline, with Washington's help, can put quite a kink into Klaus Adler's plans...

Silly?  Of course.  This film has plotholes big enough to fly a dirigible through. In fact, they even show dirigibles in space. For a moment, the movie looked like it might be serious, but when you see the Sarah Palin lookalike, well played by Stephanie Paul (move over, Tina Fey), the satiric nature is obvious. Nazis, politics in general and Sara Palin in particular, and gullibility in general all get hit with well-deserved ridicule.

At times the pacing is similar to AIRPLANE where scenes pretty much abandon the plot in order to make a joke. This movie isn't as funny as Airplane, but it does have a lot of laughs and is easy viewing while you're working out.  I give it +++.  It will get your pulse up to at least a jog.

Review of CASABLANCA

CASABLANCA

Drama, romance, WWII, Humphrey Bogart, Ingrid Bergman, Nazis, French resistance. 1942

"Here's looking at you, Kid."

The movie Casablanca is widely considered one of the finest movies ever made, but...a workout movie?

Yes. Absolutely.

For those unfortunates (mainly in recent generations) who have never seen it, here's a synopsis: World War II is raging. RICK BLAINE (Humphrey Bogart) runs a saloon and illegal casino in Casablanca, a city in unoccupied French territory. ("Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine.") People come from Nazi occupied Europe to Casablanca hoping for visas to get them to America. Unfortunately, on the black market, visas can be gotten only for large sums of money, or, as one unhappy young lady discovers, other asses--I mean assets.

                                                                                            

VICTOR LAZLO, a leader of the resistance, is one of those looking for visas for himself and his wife. Rick happens to have two visas, but Victor's wife, ILSA (Ingrid Bergman), had once been Rick's lover and had abandoned Rick suddenly and without explanation. He's still angry and refuses to help Victor and Ilsa leave Casablanca. When Victor goes to a meeting of the underground that night, Ilsa sneaks over to Rick's hotel room and pleads for the visas, but Rick remains adamant.  Then Ilsa pulls out a gun and demands the visas. "Go ahead and shoot. You'll be doing me a favor," Rick says. From there, the plot has some interesting twists...

"...you're in love with a woman. It is perhaps a strange circumstance that we both should be in love with the same woman. The first evening I came to this café, I knew there was something between you and Ilsa. Since no one is to blame, I - I demand no explanation." (Laslo to Rick) Rick is the protagonist, and is well played by Bogart in what is probably his best role, but the real hero of the story is Victor Lazlo. Brave, dedicated, charismatic, and understanding to the fault of being unrealistic, the man is a saint. The movie might be a little better if he showed some imperfection, but it's a minor point. Ingrid Bergman as Ilsa is just wonderful. I'm in love with her.  Talk about bedroom eyes, she has bridal suite eyes. My marriage could be in trouble, but fortunately, she's dead.

There is some mindless, institutional racism, but not vicious. The lack of any mention of the Holocaust or the psychotic anti-Semitism of the Nazis is more problematic, at least for me. Granted, the full horror wasn't known when the film was made (1942), but there was some information.'

This is a wonderful movie and a wonderful workout movie. If you've never seen it, you're in for a treat.  And even if you have seen it, it will frequently get your pulse up to a sprint. I give it +++++.

Review of INGLORIOUS BASTERDS

INGLORIOUS BASTERDS

This alternate history account of WWII starts in 1941 with a French farmer PERRIER LAPADITE watching with trepidation an approaching vehicle. His concern is justified. The visitor is HANS LANDA, a Nazi who equates murdering Jews with killing rats.  Landa orders Lapadite to reveal the location of a Jewish family, the Dreyfus's.  Lapadite at first says the family escaped the country, but when Landa threatens to take his daughters to be sex slaves for the Nazis, Lapadite gives up and points to the floor. The Jews are hiding in the crawlspace. Landa's soldiers pepper the floor with bullets, killing everyone in the Dreyfus family except for one daughter, Shoshanna, who manages to run away. Landa watches her leave and laughs.

Switch to 1944, when American Lieutenant ALDO RAINE (Brad Pitt) recruits eight Jewish soldiers, the Inglorious Basterds, for a mission behind enemy lines.  They ambush a German squad, and, when the squad's sergeant refuses to give them information, one of Raine's men, DONNY DONOWITZ, a big guy nicknamed 'the bear Jew,' beats the sergeant to death with a baseball bat. Only one of the Germans survives the ambush. Raine carves a swastika into his forehead both to scar him forever and also to warn Hitler that Raine's men mean business.

Shoshanna, using a pseudonym, now runs a movie theater in Paris. She learns that Goebbels, Hitler and other high level Nazis will be attending her cinema to see a propaganda film, and, with her lover, concocts a plan.  At the same time, the Basterds also plan at attack on the cinema...

No spoilers.

The plot is a lot more complicated than the details above, but it's all laid out in a clear fashion that's easy to follow. Seeing Jews beat the crap out of Nazis is a lot of fun, and the ending, though just alternate history, is exquisitely satisfying.

One plot flaw is that Raine, the leader of the Jewish band, himself is apparently not Jewish. Actor Brad Pitt certainly doesn't make a convincing Jew (he's not Jewish in real life). But this is not major.

All in all, this is a riveting and exciting movie that will often get your pulse up to a sprint.  I give it +++++.

Review of 'EVERYTHING IS ILLUMINATED'

EVERYTHING IS ILLUMINATED:

This movie is about three people on a search. Jonathan is a young American who makes a pilgrimage to the Ukraine to find the woman, Augustine, who helped his grandfather come to the United States and thus saved him from the Nazis. Jonathan is also an obsessive 'collector' who puts into little plastic bags items as varied as a piece of boiled potato and a container of shampoo snitched from the restroom of a train. Alex, his Ukrainian translator, doesn't quite understand idiomatic English and, for example, speaks of how women want to 'be carnal' with him because of his 'premium penis.' Alex's grandfather is their driver and insists on taking Sammy Davis Jr. Jr., his 'seeing eye bitch' because, insists the grandfather, he is blind (!)

The three drive through the Ukrainian countryside looking for the town where Augustine lived. Between Alex's malapropisms, Jonathan's obsessions, and the misunderstanding each has of the other's culture, I laughed out loud throughout the first half of the movie.

But the shadow of the Holocaust permeates the tale, and the grandfather's casual but repeated anti-Semitic comments accentuate the history behind the movie. Was this ridiculous old man a Nazi murderer? When they find Augustine's town, the film becomes serious, and memories of the Holocaust assume center stage.

Though I generally avoid Holocaust themed movies, this one was gripping. Non-Jews might not be as enthralled. The movie has a fair amount of symbolism and raises several unanswered questions, but instead of feeling frustrated, I went to the web to see how other people understood the ambivalences.

The music was lively and enjoyable, and the characters, in spite of their idiosyncrasies, are realistic and interesting. 

This is a well crafted film which I recommend on its cinematic merits.  However, it didn't do that much for my pulse, so I rate it only at +++ - it will get your pulse up to a jog.